Worrying about what others think? We are constantly looking out at the world and taking in information that we then measure against our own understanding and beliefs about ourselves. Put simply, we are constantly judging ourselves, against what we see, hear and feel in the external world.
Ultimately we all want to feel loved and accepted. By nature humans are herd animals, and when we perceive ourselves to be rejected, not good enough or different to the rest of the herd we can begin to feel nervous, stressed, lacking in confidence and want to hide away from the world around us.
If we look at this in a deeper way, the root of this is often in our rejection of ourselves through negative self-talk, being a harsh self-critic, not believing in ourselves and, unfortunately, often comparing ourselves physically to others. This then leads to a perception that others are rejecting us, but in fact it is merely a reflection of our self-rejection. Most often, everyone else is consumed with their own inner critic and are not judging you at all.
And then the more time we spend alone, mulling things over, looking at misleading social media and criticising ourselves, the more difficult the cycle becomes.
It can be crippling, but there are ways to walk forward, to get back into the world and reduce the “noise” of self-judgement and therefore change our external perception.
Finding your tribe can be a great start, not everyone is going to like us or be like us, but there are many people who do, and who we blend well with. Find groups with similar interests, accept invites, even just once a month will be a step out, slowly but surely, build your village.
Be kind to yourself, being human, on planet earth is tough, you are absolutely perfect just as you are.
Adopt the mantra- This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine. Everyone has a gift, a talent, discover yours and share it.
Just simply walk, put some music on and go for a walk, this will increase endorphins and eventually your worries will fade away.
Have a social media free week, it is false advertising for life… life itself is out there waiting for you to live it. You are part of this tribe and we are here for you. X