Sometimes we just want to be heard. Most women can relate to this. We just want a listening ear, not someone who’s going to fix it all, just simply someone who’s going to listen to what our concerns, hopes, fears and ideas are. Someone to bounce them off and maybe get another perspective.
Listening and hearing what someone is saying is truly a therapy and practice in its own right. So often I hear people say that they have been to the doctor and they didn’t feel heard, or even listened too.
During the current crisis that we are in this is even more apparent than ever. Not only am I now hearing that the Doctor isn’t listening, but that the Government too isn’t listening, and families, friends, children, partners, trusted professionals, it seems everyone is in a room shouting and not a single person is listening or being/feeling heard. And the damage this is doing is phenomenal and catastrophic.
There are many ways we can listen and actually hear what is being said, this is not always just through verbal interactions, we can look at body language, eye contact, actions, behaviours, and we can actively enquire, ask questions, repeat back how we are interpreting the answers, we can research and learn what the person is talking about, instead of assuming and dismissing.
And this relates to anything, take anxiety for example, we can take this at face value and think oh right, you feel a little anxious, and have a certain set of symptoms, but if we research and enquire we could find that it is a specific type of anxiety, that perhaps there are past traumas that are contributing to the feeling, that the diet is poor and always has been so there are nutrient deficiencies that are contributing to this feeling, we may chat about lifestyle and find that the people around them are negative and judgemental and this is contributing to the feeling. So ultimately we see that this isn’t just a simple case of anxious feelings, we see that there are many facets to why the person is experiencing anxiety and we can then begin to address and support the person as a whole rather than a set of symptoms.
When I am looking with my body therapist hat on I am also looking at your pulse, what that is telling me, for example is your Liver under pressure, is your digestion sluggish, do you have heat in your Large intestine, is your overall energy weak, could there be an underlying viral load, or an infection, do you just need nourishing and rest. The pulse can tell us many things. Your tongue also has its own story to tell, including gut health and dysbiosis, heat, fluid, dampness and swelling in the body, overindulgence perhaps or just not enough fluid, how sensitive your nature is or physical injuries. The body tells a thousand stories, we can palpate the tissues and see where the tension lies in your body, what physical tendencies may have been accumulated or inherited.
We are all so very different, not one size fits all, what works for one person may not work for the next. And this an absolute truth not a variable truth. This could contribute to people having injury for a medicine that has been introduced as a one size fits all remedy. It is not fiction that many people are having adverse reactions to a medicine that has be forced upon the masses as the panacea for the current health crisis. And how do we know that one medicine to fit all is not a wise health move, because we are all different. Our genetic history, our health history, our diets, lifestyles, jobs, physical, mental and emotional view on life, our stress reactions, what triggers us and what calms us, all very different.
And the quicker we all understand that, and appreciate that and value that then the quicker we can move away from the one size fits all approach. The quicker we can move towards harmony and supporting each person as an individual and then finding what is the best approach so that no one is left behind, no one is at risk and no one is harmed unnecessarily.
The current model is broken, and we collectively can say no more, it is time for a new approach.
“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete”. R. Buckminster Fuller